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Picked by 3 of my closest friends I must admit this is pretty damn close. ‘Forget her birthday, however, and she’ll quickly forget you.’ Hahahaha
Wednesday, May 25
Sunday, May 22
The Way I Am.
When it's someone I love, gender roles never come to mind. There ain't such thing as 'he's the man so he pays for the meals, you're traveling to him it is only right he pays, he should always initiate things FIRST or he must give in in an argument' etc. Nope. When able to, I reach for my purse all the time, I handle the arrangements, I restart conversations and I apologize when it isn't necessarily my mistake.
In a nutshell, I never sit on my ass waiting for a man to perform.
And for this I've been chided or strongly disagreed upon by fellow women (usually older with more experience in life). I am shown DUH responses quite often as I ask questions off my own benchmark. "Of course he pays every time. I'm not asking for branded stuff like other women very good already." "Why should I make peace first? You siao ah haha. 好男人就该迁就女人。"
I am told (gently) the way I am will allow men to set a lower bar and shirk their responsibilities in a relationship. That they may grow comfortable with giving less in the long run.
So yup I have wondered at times. Could it be because I don't love myself enough? Or that I'm willing to be a doormat for love? Probably that's what it seems to the outside world.
But the way I see it, men and women have very equal parts to play in order to keep a relationship going. Financially, emotionally and even the physical intimacy between them. I believe regardless of what the other party brings to the table, I should never dwindle into a lousier version of me. And really, I love myself enough to stay true to this person that I am. It's OK if the gratification of being woman is lost along the way, ego is compromised and values are thrown out the window. I try to find a middle ground. I don't wait for a man to deliver on the expectation that he is a man.
Instead... I work on a deadline when it comes to love. The day I instinctively know my heart runs dry is when I lose the will to involve the person in my feelings. There's no longer a need to explain, or clarify intents because for thus long, I've reached out from my conscience. If nothing else, he should know better. The day I know I'm helpless against a state of things is when it's clear that everything has gone completely unappreciated, unnoticed and unreciprocated.
It could take months, even years for the end to arrive but this is just the way I am.
In a nutshell, I never sit on my ass waiting for a man to perform.
And for this I've been chided or strongly disagreed upon by fellow women (usually older with more experience in life). I am shown DUH responses quite often as I ask questions off my own benchmark. "Of course he pays every time. I'm not asking for branded stuff like other women very good already." "Why should I make peace first? You siao ah haha. 好男人就该迁就女人。"
I am told (gently) the way I am will allow men to set a lower bar and shirk their responsibilities in a relationship. That they may grow comfortable with giving less in the long run.
So yup I have wondered at times. Could it be because I don't love myself enough? Or that I'm willing to be a doormat for love? Probably that's what it seems to the outside world.
But the way I see it, men and women have very equal parts to play in order to keep a relationship going. Financially, emotionally and even the physical intimacy between them. I believe regardless of what the other party brings to the table, I should never dwindle into a lousier version of me. And really, I love myself enough to stay true to this person that I am. It's OK if the gratification of being woman is lost along the way, ego is compromised and values are thrown out the window. I try to find a middle ground. I don't wait for a man to deliver on the expectation that he is a man.
Instead... I work on a deadline when it comes to love. The day I instinctively know my heart runs dry is when I lose the will to involve the person in my feelings. There's no longer a need to explain, or clarify intents because for thus long, I've reached out from my conscience. If nothing else, he should know better. The day I know I'm helpless against a state of things is when it's clear that everything has gone completely unappreciated, unnoticed and unreciprocated.
It could take months, even years for the end to arrive but this is just the way I am.
Wednesday, May 11
Exploited.
Picturesque accounts on IG are growing by the millions. I agree. No doubt it's a great thing to be exposed to talent like that. But naked selfies lying in bed wearing nothing but underwear? Repetitive close ups or cleavage baring shots? That's not art.
More an act of vanity, 100s of pictures posing against a backdrop of nature (not to say making people help do so) isn't quite the same as being outdoorsy.
Outdoorsy is someone who won't entertain such thoughts. Instead of leaving an impression online, he or she spends that time offline experiencing those moments in reality. A picture or two's legit (self-love is so important) but every other day? That doesn't translate to a luxurious life but a narcissistic type which by the way, is under the realm of personality disorders.
It amuses me how IG users take to adding ghost accounts to increase followers. The point of having 1000+ followers but only 25 reckons on your photo? Don't see it.
And some habitually use public platforms to their advantage. You know the ones posting ambiguous quotes (seemingly wise) but damn well meant to sully the people who failed them. Or along the lines of
It amuses me how IG users take to adding ghost accounts to increase followers. The point of having 1000+ followers but only 25 reckons on your photo? Don't see it.
And some habitually use public platforms to their advantage. You know the ones posting ambiguous quotes (seemingly wise) but damn well meant to sully the people who failed them. Or along the lines of
#janeisstrong #bettertolosethantoneverlove
#smilenomatterwhat #confidence
Like no, that's just awkward for everyone?
Of course. This is an opinion. Social media has allowed lots of us to fulfil our need for validation and attention. But as it becomes increasingly present, I think it's good to recognize it is no longer simply a way to connect people - period. It hinges on the edges of obsession when exploited.
#smilenomatterwhat #confidence
Like no, that's just awkward for everyone?
Of course. This is an opinion. Social media has allowed lots of us to fulfil our need for validation and attention. But as it becomes increasingly present, I think it's good to recognize it is no longer simply a way to connect people - period. It hinges on the edges of obsession when exploited.
A media analyst commented this, ‘How tasteful an online persona is, is directly proportional to that of how tasteful his or her personality in real life would be. If we are discerning enough.’
Buying into social media as a cohesive generation, what we are impressed by and agree on is very telling of our tastes. At UWA, I covered a report on social media psychology and scored my first A! Wish I could do it again hahaha. Social networks have evolved so much now. It is equally encouraging and disheartening.
Spend more on relations, less on impression.
Buying into social media as a cohesive generation, what we are impressed by and agree on is very telling of our tastes. At UWA, I covered a report on social media psychology and scored my first A! Wish I could do it again hahaha. Social networks have evolved so much now. It is equally encouraging and disheartening.
Spend more on relations, less on impression.
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